Separation ends a Relationship-NOT a family
“ The next stage of life can be compromised and contaminated if the court hears evidence here today. Rather than press that button, there may be wisdom spending time with a mediator instead of thrashing it out in court.”
Judge Patrick Durcan, Ennis Family Court, Irish Times, Sept. 17,2017
Mediation lessens the financial and emotional damage to your family
- You and your spouse retain control of the financial and parenting decisions
- You control the timing and the meeting schedule
- You have a more comprehensive and durable agreement since you arrived at it together in a privacy not possible in Court.
- Your costs are significantly less.
The conflict between impacts heavily-it is a factor we are in control of. That is not to say that it is easy. I routinely see parents find bravery and self-restainst in the interest of their children. Lecturing children about doing the right thing is easy-but can we show them what that looks like in this situation? I think the answer is yes.
Are we right for Mediation?
The entire focus in mediation is on resolving your differences in a respectful, cost-effective manner. It can be a useful approach when you both:
- Are willing to meet together vs. having Solicitors communicate for you?
- Are you willing to provide full and honest disclosure?
- Do you want to control the timing and outcome of your separation or divorce?
- Are able to make trade-offs to come to an agreement?
Solicitors advice is valuable. Be aware they are able to act as Consultants in this situation. In this role they give advice throughout the Mediation process and draft the final agreement which becomes a binding legal document. This results in greatly reduced legal fees. Mediation is not mandatory. It is preferred unless there are clear reasons that it would not be appropriate in your situation.